I know I’m usually sharing all sorts of ideas for activities with kids or ways to handle conflict lovingly, but today I want to talk about the importance of taking time AWAY from your kids.

We all need alone time but I hear from a lot of parents that they feel guilty when they take time away from their kids.  Let me allay your fears.  Yes, you are your child’s biggest influence and the people they most need to connect with, AND it’s absolutely healthy and good for them to develop relationships with other adults.

If you have a nanny, babysitter, aunt, uncle, or grandparent who loves your children, please give them the opportunity to have a closer relationship with your kids by going away for the weekend, having a date night, or going to a yoga class.  It’s good for you and it’s also really good for your kids.

When young people have the opportunity to develop strong bonds with people other than their parents, they become more well rounded, better able to adapt, and they’re exposed to new ways of thinking and new ways of doing things.  This all provides variety and learning that you can’t give to your kids otherwise.

A study recently came out showing that children who had two parents who participated in their upbringing, specifically, kids who had a relationship with their fathers as well as with their mothers had higher IQ’s than kids who only had a mother in their lives.  In fact, researchers could tell who had had a father’s influence during childhood when they looked at the IQ scores of people in their 20’s!

What can we infer from this study?  Well, I for one, think that if two parents are better than one parent, then even more caring adult influences are likely to benefit your child too.

Maybe I’m biased, because after my parents divorced and remarried, I ended up with four loving parents who cared for me, connected with me, and shared their world-views with me.  I even spent a couple of school years going over to my grandparents’ house after school, so I had the opportunity to develop a strong bond with my grandma and grandpa.

As a kid, I loved getting new perspectives and ideas from the adults in my life and I often tried to emulate the best qualities I could find in each of them.  As a result, I think I turned out to be a pretty great, well adjusted, and compassionate person.  I also got the idea that I was a pretty lovable and likable person, because I had a bunch of wonderfully supportive adults who enjoyed my company.

OK, now that I’ve convinced you that it benefits your child to spend time away from you, what about the benefits to you?!  When you get time away you’re able to look at things from a new perspective.  You might get some new insights into a recurring dynamic at home, or you might just relax and enjoy yourself, allowing yourself to let go and stop being responsible for another human being for a moment.  Ahhhh, that feels pretty good.

The other thing that happens when you take time and space from your kids, whether it’s a weekend away or a few hours every afternoon, is you actually miss them!  And that’s a VERY good thing for you and for your kids.  When you get the space you need and you find yourself longing for reconnection with your kids, I guarantee the quality of your interactions when you reconnect will be much better.

On the other hand, if you’d rather force yourself to spend all of your free time with your kids, feel guilty for even wanting some space, and then build castles of anger and resentment, I guess that’s a valid choice.  It just seems like a lot less fun for everyone.

So, this week’s challenge is to foster your child’s relationship with another adult by taking time for yourself.  Try really pampering yourself and see how much you can enjoy it.  Really let go of any residual guilt you may have felt in the past and relish your alone time this week.

Have a wonderful week.  Warm hugs, Shelly

Reading to your kids is a crucially important part of your job as a parent.  And sometimes story time can begin to fall through the cracks of our busy lives.  So this week, I’m writing about the many reasons story time is such an important part of parenting.  I’m hoping to re-inspire you to commit to a daily story time for your kids whether they’re one-year-old, six, or twelve.

My parents all helped to teach me a love of reading that has enriched my life immensely.  My mom and dad read to me every night before bed when I was very young.  My step-mom read me “Little Women” over the course of several months when I was nine.  My mom read chapter books to my brother and me as my step-dad drove us miles and miles on our family vacations.  And in junior high and high school when I showed an interest in science fiction, my step dad turned me on to Douglas Adams.

Let’s explore how reading to your children at various ages supports their growth and development:

As a baby and toddler, your little one is picking up language skills at a phenomenal rate.  Reading to young people helps them increase their vocabulary, understand the parts of language, and learn the rules of English (if that’s your primary language).  There is nothing else you can do that has more of an impact on your child’s future ability to read and learn than a daily story time.  I recommend at least 30min. a day of reading together even with children as young as five or six months old.

When you point to objects and name them, your toddler can quickly learn to identify many more objects than he can verbalize.  Try asking your pre-verbal little one to point to the ball or shoe and you’ll be amazed at how much he can comprehend, even before he can speak.

As your child grows, story time becomes a bonding, connected time that your child can count on.  The emotional security that can grow from taking the time to sit down and read together is truly priceless.  It lets your child know first that she’s important to you and second, that reading and learning are fun.

And by pointing to the words on the page as you read, you’re helping her learn to recognize words.  Before you know it, she’ll be sight reading several words just because she’s had the repetition of hearing the word and seeing it on the page so many times before.

By using story time as a time to discuss moral lessons, develop problem-solving skills, and improve comprehension, you can have a deeply meaningful conversation with your child every day.  You can discover more about who your child is and what he values by asking questions about the story.  “Why do you think Peter told everyone there was a wolf when there really wasn’t?” or “How do you think Arthur is feeling right now?” and even, “Is there another way they could have done things that would have worked better?”

Young people can come up with some pretty creative solutions when given the opportunity to brainstorm with an open, accepting adult.  The depth of understanding and the creativity that children use to solve the problems with which I present them constantly amazes me.

As your child matures, you can begin to read chapter books together and have even more in-depth discussions about the characters, learning and understanding their motivations and even discussing moral conundrums.  “Do you think it was OK for Sally to steal food for her brothers and sisters?”

Even after your child is reading well on his own, he will still benefit from being read to for as long as he enjoys it.  And when he’s ready to transition to reading on his own for most of the time, you can each read the same book and discuss it afterward.

There’s no doubt in my mind that my ability to read well, comprehend easily, do well in school and become a good test taker were all a result of my parents’ commitment to the written word.  But that’s not the most compelling reason to read to your kids.  Imagine your favorite books and how deeply they’ve impacted you.  Think about that super funny novel you read last week or the newspaper article that shocked you and seemed to turn your world upside down.   Now imagine a world without those pleasures and surprises.  Are you ready to re-commit to a daily story time yet?    I sure hope so!

Have a fantastic week.  Warmly, Shelly

It’s easy to get into a pattern of saying things like, “Stop!”, “No!” or “Don’t do that” with kids.  They’re constantly experimenting with both the physical world and with social boundaries.  As a result they have a tendency to do things we don’t approve of or enjoy at least some of the time (and often a LOT of the time).

How we handle these moments can make a huge impact on a child and on what they’ll choose to do the next time.  Because their subconscious mind is actually more developed than their conscious mind, kids have a hard time hearing negatives. Instead, they tend to focus on the real content of what we’re saying, rather than the positive or negative we’ve tacked on to it.  So for instance, when we say, “Don’t pee in your pants” kids hear “Pee in your pants” and when we say “Stop hitting your brother” kids hear “Hit your brother.”

When we realize that kids hear and understand differently than adults do, it’s much easier to have compassion for their behavior.  Often times, they’re not consciously intending to be defiant, they simply aren’t processing all of what we’re saying and they’re compelled to do the very thing that we’re putting so much energy and attention toward.

So while we try to focus on the positive in our everyday lives, it’s all the more crucial that we do so with young people.  Rather than, “Don’t fall” try saying, “Be careful” or “Watch your step” and instead of “Stop hitting” try “Remember to be kind to others” or “Let’s use our hands for loving kindness.”

Children respond incredibly well to positive reinforcement of the behaviors we most want.  When we can remember to let them know that we appreciate and enjoy what they’re doing, kids are easily able to do even more of those things.  But when we forget and begin to tell them about all the things they do that frustrate and upset us, young people are compelled to do more of those things, simply because that’s where the focus and attention is. If you want to find out more about the power of your attention, check out my former blog on just that subject.

Now I’m not saying you shouldn’t address big instances of behavior that concerns you.  You certainly can talk to your child about hitting, lying or other behaviors that don’t work for you.  Just remember to put a positive spin on things, letting your child know exactly what he or she can do in the future that you will enjoy and appreciate.  And then, be sure to notice those efforts and offer some positive feedback.  “Wow, I see you’ve cleaned up that milk you spilled without me even asking!  Thank you so much!”

You can absolutely talk with your child about your concerns about her lying, letting her know that you’re worried and you really want to be able to believe her and trust that she’s telling you the truth.  Just remember to put more emphasis on what you want than on what you didn’t enjoy.  And be sure to really let her know that you appreciate her efforts when you do notice a change in behavior.

One more note about lying, the earlier you can catch it and the more levity you can have about it, the more likely your child is to give it up.  So, rather than having a stern conversation about a little white lie, you might choose to joke with her, saying, “Are you SURE that dog was purple?  I don’t know, I think it might have been green.”  Try your best to save the stern conversations for the lies that deeply concern you and then be sure to tell her exactly how she can rebuild any trust that was damaged.

A few more examples of ways you can turn things around:

Instead of “Stop fighting with your brother!”, try “Remember loving kindness” or at a time when your kids are getting along great, “Wow, I love it when you two take such good care of each other.”

Instead of “No grabbing!” try, “Hmmm, let’s practice sharing…what can I share with you?  What can you share with your sister?”

Instead of “Don’t fall!” or “You’re going to hurt yourself!” try, “Listen your body and take good care of yourself, I trust you.”

I hope these examples are helpful for you and I’d love to hear about your own experiences of focusing on what you DO want.  How is it working for you?  Please leave me a comment below.

Have a fantastic day, Shelly

The “find it” game is a fun game for times when you don’t have a lot of attention to give but you want to help stimulate your child’s mind and have fun together even while you’re busy at other tasks.

This game can be modified for ages 1-7.  For the youngest kids you can ask your child to find something familiar like his favorite stuffed animal or blanket.  Then, you can ask your child to put it in an unusual place (like in the dry bathtub) and then go find it again.  The ability to remember where something is and go retrieve it even when it’s out of sight is a useful skill for young children as it requires memory and visualization.

As your child grows older and needs a more complex “find it” game, you can ask her to find a blue crayon, a red triangle, or a specific item from a specific drawer.

So let’s say you’re busy cooking and your child seems bored.  You can offer, “Hey, do you want to play the ‘find it’ game?”  You’ll usually hear an enthusiastic yes from your child.  “Great!  Can you go into the bathroom and look in the far right drawer and find me a brown hair tie?”  When they’ve brought it, “Thanks!  Now let’s see, can you find your baby brother’s favorite book?  The one about the white mitten?”

Another tack is to ask something like, “Can you find something on the living room floor that doesn’t belong there?” and when they bring it, “I wonder where that belongs…”

If you have letter or number magnets on the refrigerator, “Do you see a blue letter R?” and if you don’t, “Can you find a butterfly magnet?”

When your kids are even older, “Can you find the ¾” wrench? I think it’s in the tool box in the garage” or “Can you help me find the oregano?” or even, “Can you find a toy mammal with hooves?”

When kids play the “find it” game, they feel joyful because they’re able to contribute in some way.  They also often feel proud because they were able to find the specific object you’ve asked for or because they figured out a puzzle (in the case of “find an orange circle” or a similar task).

I would love to hear about the find it games at your house.  Is this something you already play with your child or is it a new idea for you?  Please share your thoughts below.

Have a fantastic day, Shelly

Learning doesn’t just happen at school. You can stimulate your child’s mind at home with these simple activities:

Sometimes when kids seem to need a lot of extra attention, are bugging you constantly to watch TV and movies, or are generally in your face 24/7, they might actually be asking for more intellectual stimulation.   When kids get bored, they turn to you for help, but they might not know exactly what they’re wanting.

If you think this might be what’s happening in your household, I’ll give you some ideas and examples of simple things you can do to stimulate your child’s mind, support more independence, and encourage self-directed activities.

First, consider your child’s favorite things.  Does she love dinosaurs, dolls, horses, or art?  Does he enjoy cooking or playing in the sandbox?  These preferences can inform which kinds of activities your child will enjoy right now.  Let’s say she’s into dinosaurs.  She loves to play with her dinosaurs and sometimes corrects you when you call them by the wrong name.

So, how can you create an engaging, self-directed activity that will build on your child’s knowledge and encourage her to learn even more about dinosaurs?  If you have a book in which dinosaurs are classified into carnivores and herbivores, you can create a fun activity that she can do on her own.  If you combine her basket of dinosaurs and the book about carnivores/herbivores, add a green piece of construction paper on which you will write “Herbivores” and a red piece of paper on which you will write, “Carnivores” you have a fun game!  Just show her how to set out each piece of paper, choose a dinosaur from the basket, look in the book to check whether this dinosaur is a carnivore or a herbivore, put the dinosaur on the appropriate piece of paper and then choose another dinosaur!

When she has classified all of her dinosaurs she can come get you and you can discuss her reasoning.  Be careful not to correct your child’s work at this point.  The idea is to encourage self directed activity that is intellectually stimulating and if she thinks she’s going to get a “bad grade” at the end, there’s no motivation to do the activity again.  However, if you sit with her and ask questions like, “Wow, I’m confused, I thought a stegosaurus was a carnivore, how did you know it’s an herbivore?” then she gets to teach you, and teaching is an even more stimulating way to learn something.

Another idea for a pre-reader is to make small paper signs that say things like door, mop, sink, book, ball, table.  Put tape on the back of each and then invite your child to find the items and tape the signs on.  Pretty soon, your child will begin to recognize words even before he’s able to read!

You can also adapt this activity by using a basket of miniature items and laminated cards with words on them for beginner readers.  Easy words like dog, cat, and hat can be matched up with a tiny toy dog, cat, or hat.  Kids love these types of matching games and they learn while they play!

To make this game easier for a child who’s not reading yet, create sets of cards.  First, create two matching cards each with a sticker, picture or drawing of a cat and write the word cat below.  Now cut the word off of the second set of cards.  Now you have three sets of cards- a control set with pictures and words, a set with pictures only and a set with words.  Show your child how to match up the control set with the other sets.  Again, remember, it’s not important that they get it right, it’s just important that they’re engaged and having fun with it!  I find that it helps to do this activity at a table or on a small rug on the floor so that their workspace is contained.

I hope that some of these ideas have sparked your creativity and your desire to stimulate your child’s mind.  Please write to me with your thoughts, other ideas, questions, and stories about how these activities work for you!

Big hugs, Shelly

Confused about how to deal with tantrums? I sure was. I couldn’t figure out why my students or charges would just flip out over seemingly trivial things like the color of their socks. There were times when I changed the color of a child’s cup so many times I had a huge pile of dishes by the end of lunch. Sometimes I felt like I was dealing with a crazy person.

I KNOW you’ve experienced this. One minute, things are fine and the next, your child is screaming, throwing herself on the floor and crying so hard she can hardly even catch her breath to tell you what happened. Then, when you finally discover what set her off, you’re left wondering how that could possibly matter enough to create such a huge reaction.

As a parent or caregiver experiencing a child’s tantrum, we can feel confused, powerless, and overwhelmed. I’ve often thought, “Oh no! What went wrong? And how can I get her to stop?”

But after experiencing more and more tantrums, I began to discover that getting kids to stop isn’t always the most connecting thing we can do. Not only that, but when kids freak out, it’s not necessarily a bad thing.

In my own life, I’ve really valued being able to release my feelings through crying or raging, so why would I want to take that experience of release and relief away from the young people in my life?

I’ve found that by relating to tantrums in a new way, I have a completely different experience. Now, when I see a child “lose it” I feel compassion and understanding and sometimes even joy in the knowledge that they won’t be carrying around the weight of that emotional baggage for the rest of their lives, instead, they’ve released their feelings fully in the moment.

And, after being with a child during a good cry, I’ve had some of the sweetest, most connected moments. I’m always amazed too that kids can let go of their upset so quickly. I’ve had countless experiences where a child was screaming one minute and happily playing alone the next.

So, my advice is to remember that emotions are always moving and changing, no matter what you do, so why not celebrate and enjoy them?!

The other thing I’ve reailized through my many many hours with young people is that tantrums are often preventable. Try following the guidelines below and create a more peaceful and connected life for you and your kids.

Prevent- I’ve found that many tantrums come from a child’s frustration with unmet needs for autonomy, play, and attention. By addressing these needs throughout the day, you can prevent many tantrums from happening. “How?”, you ask? Here are a few ideas for how to address these common unmet needs that most children have.

• Autonomy- Let them do it by themselves, allow them to choose, and let them be in charge sometimes. You could even assign a task to your kids, put someone in charge and let them figure out how to accomplish the task. Be available to help if they really need it, but resist the urge to jump in to add your suggestions.

• Play- Get down and dirty, be silly, wear a funny hat and talk in an accent. Children learn by playing, so if they don’t get enough play, they crave it. You might be surprised at how little time it actually takes to turn something into a game.

• Attention- The next time she has something to tell you, stop what you’re doing and really be present with her. Give her your undivided attention. Ask questions to draw her ideas out more fully and let her know that her thoughts, opinions, and new skills matter to you.

Educate- Teaching kids how to identify and express their emotions BEFORE they’ve lost control is another great way to prevent tantrums. But you can also use a tantrum that happened earlier, to teach your kids what precipitated it. “Wow, sweetie, remember earlier when you were crying and hitting? It seems like you were feeling really frustrated because you really wanted to continue playing your game. Is that right? I wonder if the next time you’re feeling frustrated you could say, ‘I’m frustrated, I really want to play with my train Mom!’ That way, we can figure out a solution that works for both of us.”

Listen- If you’re unable to head it off at the pass or talk your way through it, the most connecting thing you can do is to take a few minutes, sit down and listen to your child cry. By supporting kids in expressing themselves, and staying with them through the storm, we let them know that we’ll love them no matter what and it’s ok to have big feelings.

For more great tips about how to deal with tantrums and other big feelings check out our audio program Perspectives on Feelings. It comes with a workbook, transcript, and an 11 week e-course to help you integrate what you’ve learned.

Oh! And I have an interview coming up! You can sign up, ask your most pressing questions about tantrums, and listen in on the call. I hope to connect with you there.

I’d love to know how it’s going at home. Please leave your comments below!

Thanks, Shelly

Hey Everybody, Jill and I are gearing up for the big launch of the Perspectives on Feelings audio program. So, we thought we’d start by answering some of your specific questions about how to deal with feelings and how kids express their feelings. In this video I describe some things that Marcella can try with her stepson to encourage him to express himself even more authentically.

I hope you enjoyed my short video about how to give kids even more insight into their own feelings. Please let me know what you think! Oh, and keep an eye out for Jill’s first video next week…

You can see the concentration!

Create new exciting activities your kids will love and read a novel for a change!

Remember how you used to love to read for pleasure?  You’d spend hours in a well-lit room with a book and at the end of it, you didn’t know a new recipe, have another way to spice things up in the bedroom, or learn how to install blinds.  Instead, you had memories of far away landscapes and intimate relationships with imaginary characters

Ahh, the joy of fiction.

But now, you have kids.  You don’t have time to read for pleasure– right?  WRONG!!!  In fact, it’s more important than EVER that you do WHATEVER brings you joy and pleasure.

You are your child’s most important influence and, along with any other caregivers, the people she’s most likely to emulate.  Don’t you want your child to ENJOY life?!

Of course you do, so please, take extra time today and every day to take good care of yourself and enjoy your own process of living and growing.

Your homework for this week:  Take good of yourself, give yourself things you enjoy, and become your kids’ example of how to enjoy your life.

For extra credit, practice taking care of yourself FIRST and inviting your spouse (or other adults) and child to be patient and wait for your help.  I know, crazy, huh?

So, how are you going to go about eking out the, quiet alone time you crave the most?  Here’s the secret: Create activities for your kids ahead of time!

Wait a minute, you’re thinking, didn’t you JUST say I should be taking care of myself first?

Well, yes, yes I did.

But please let me share what I’ve learned from being responsible for 12–24 three, four and five year olds for 40 hours a week (of awake time, mind you) over three school years and from being a nanny for several years.

When the room and activities are well prepared, well organized, and easy to access, kids are more self-sufficient and focused– and I get more time to take care of what’s on my plate, or just take a break and make myself some tea.

So, when I can think ahead about what kids might need to keep themselves busy learning for half an hour or more, I get whole chunks of time when everybody in the  classroom or house is quietly learning, playing, taking care of the environment, or producing new work.

This all really meets my needs for peace, learning, and freedom to do my own thing.

You might be wondering, what could possibly keep my little one engaged for half an hour of independent play?  Well, here’s a list of some engaging activities you might offer based on ages. These activities will benefit your child just as much at home as they would in a classroom setting, as long as you provide the kind of quiet, calm environment that’s most conducive to learning.

One year old —Large Motor Activity:  Putting the ball down the chute—First find a large cardboard tube.  You can use a wrapping paper tube, but bigger would be better.  Prop the tube up so that one end is about eye level on your child.  Leave the other end in an open area.  Find several balls that fit easily through the tube.  Show your one year old how to put the ball in one end and watch it come out the other end.  They’ll be delighted and want to repeat the experience again and again.  Now’s your chance to get back to that novel.

Two year old—Small Motor Activity: Putting things in and taking things out– you can use a box, a bag, or anything with a hole.  Kids this age are fascinated with putting things into other things and taking things out of hidden locations.

Three year old—Practical Life Activity: Pouring– three year olds are often determined to do the things adults can do.  Pouring is an especially challenging and fun activity.  Start with something easy, like beans that are easy to pick up.  Watch to be sure no one’s eating beans.  When your child can consistently pour without spilling, graduate to rice, and finally to thick and then thin liquids.  Coloring the liquid can re–invigorate interest well into age 4 or 5.

Four year old—Sorting Activity: Determining differences and similarities is the basis for all science.  Give your little one a head start by encouraging sorting activities.  Try to find items with distinct differences in either shape or color, and graduate to more subtle differences.  Provide a bowl for each group of items (if color sorting, finding a bowl the same color seems to help).  Sorting a bag of mixed beans by type of bean can take an hour– and it’s ever so satisfying!

Five year old —Scavenger Hunt Activity:  Following a list of instructions is wonderful skill to begin to develop with five year olds.  Make a list of clues or instructions.  For pre-readers use picture clues and/or read them aloud.  See how well you can hone in on your child’s abilities and help them if they get frustrated or lost.  At the end, be sure that the last clue leads your child to something she really enjoys- otherwise scavenger hunts are no fun.

Six year old—Hospitality Activity:  Making a tray with drinks or snacks or both for a guest or family. This one does require supervision especially for the first few times.  But after a while, when their skills and your confidence reach a certain level, children delight in doing these preparations themselves. I have even seen children in this age group be able to make and serve tea with hot water!  Provide a pitcher, cups, beverage, small bowls, and several snack choices.  Invite your child to ask you or guest their preferences.  Pour liquids on a low surface like a chair for ease.  Place items on a tray and serve.  Provide a towel for spills. 

Seven year old—Geography Activity: Laminate a U.S .or world map, and get some stickers.  Create a list of the locations of recent vacations, relatives, locations from stories, or major cities—ask your child to place a sticker at each location.

There is no substitute for your time and attention. And—your child also can benefit from learning to play independently. Plus, you need a break. With the activities above, you can meet all those needs.

I’d love to hear how these, or your own ideas work. Please share your thoughts in the box below.

Thanks for being here!  Hugs, Shelly

Ever wonder why we have the impulse to rock babies to help them calm down?

Studies show that rocking, spinning and other physical movement through space helps children’s brain development and their ability to pay attention, by stimulating the vestibular (inner ear) system.

And here’s the thing, this works with both infants and older kids. It can also be a really fun way for you to cut lose and play with your kids.

So, the next time your little guy is about to lose it, check with him about whether it sounds fun, and then spin around with him in your arms, or take him to a nearby swing-set.

Even hanging upside down can produce vestibular stimulation. Just make sure he’s enjoying it, and not getting dizzy or upset. It never hurts to ask, “Is this okay?”

Believe it or not, when we get lots of motion through space (like on a swing, dancing, or spinning) it actually helps our senses work better. With some well-timed rocking or spinning, stimulation, your little dude could be settling down with his dinosaurs for some sustained play time.

In other words, you may get to shower today! Hooray!

So here’s the deal with vestibular stimulation: you want to offer your baby or child lots of it. As long as she looks content, just keep rocking and/or spinning.

After a while, you’ll either have a sleepy child, or an awake, alert child.

When babies and children are in the “awake-alert” state, they’re most open to learning new information. So, in a way, vestibular stimulation helps the brain decide whether it’s ready for more learning, or needs sleep to help process what’s already been learned.

When you have an awake-alert baby or young child it’s a perfect time to get out a few favorite toys, or a new puzzle, sit back, and enjoy your little ones as they learn and grow.

When I worked in Montessori schools, we’d often use this tool to help our most active kids settle in to their work. If we noticed someone wandering around, bothering other kids, and unable to decide what activity to choose- we’d just send him or her out to the swings for five minutes.

After a few minutes of swinging, the child would almost magically come back into the classroom, decide on an activity, sit down and really concentrate for a half an hour or more! I sometimes couldn’t believe it was the same kid.

So, enjoy this new tool and use it whenever your kid seems unfocused, erratic, or is just looking for trouble.

I’d love to hear your comments about this topic and your stories about trying it out. Please leave your thoughts or stories in the box below.

Warmly,
Shelly Birger