Sleep more, learn more

Wow, this week has been all about sleep research.  I’ve been reading “Nurture Shock” by Po Bronson & Ashley Marryman and whoa, the new sleep research is startling!  I also watched a Nova special on sleep, and then last night my husband and I watched an episode of Star Trek Next Generation where the whole crew suffers from sleep deprivation due to lack of REM sleep.

It’s all pretty interesting stuff, so here’s what I’ve learned so far…

1)     We dream in all stages of sleep, not just REM sleep and scientists think that REM sleep dreams are specifically designed as practice to help us figure out how to handle emotionally difficult situations. read more

Spinning and swinging for fun, focus, and emotion regulation

The vestibular system is responsible for balance, focus, and even plays a role in emotion regulation. But the best way to activate the vestibular system is by moving through space. So, if your child is having trouble with focus or emotion regulation, try encouraging movements like spinning and swinging and you’ll notice a huge change.

At Montessori school, we used the swings to help kids focus at least several times a week. I even activate my own vestibular system by doing somersaults whenever I’m feeling socially anxious. (So if we’re at a party together and I sneak into a back hallway for a moment, you know what I’m up to.) The thing is, it really works! After a few forward rolls, I feel so much happier and better able to engage and be social. If you don’t believe me, I challenge you to try it for yourself. read more

The Importance of Time Away From Your Kids

I know I’m usually sharing all sorts of ideas for activities with kids or ways to handle conflict lovingly, but today I want to talk about the importance of taking time AWAY from your kids.

We all need alone time but I hear from a lot of parents that they feel guilty when they take time away from their kids.  Let me allay your fears.  Yes, you are your child’s biggest influence and the people they most need to connect with, AND it’s absolutely healthy and good for them to develop relationships with other adults. read more

Read it again please! The importance of story time

bigstockphoto_Story_Time_588Reading to your kids is a crucially important part of your job as a parent.  And sometimes story time can begin to fall through the cracks of our busy lives.  So this week, I’m writing about the many reasons story time is such an important part of parenting.  I’m hoping to re-inspire you to commit to a daily story time for your kids whether they’re one-year-old, six, or twelve.

My parents all helped to teach me a love of reading that has enriched my life immensely.  My mom and dad read to me every night before bed when I was very young.  My step-mom read me “Little Women” over the course of several months when I was nine.  My mom read chapter books to my brother and me as my step-dad drove us miles and miles on our family vacations.  And in junior high and high school when I showed an interest in science fiction, my step dad turned me on to Douglas Adams. read more

Working with the child mind: Saying what you DO want gets the best results

42-15618349It’s easy to get into a pattern of saying things like, “Stop!”, “No!” or “Don’t do that” with kids.  They’re constantly experimenting with both the physical world and with social boundaries.  As a result they have a tendency to do things we don’t approve of or enjoy at least some of the time (and often a LOT of the time).

How we handle these moments can make a huge impact on a child and on what they’ll choose to do the next time.  Because their subconscious mind is actually more developed than their conscious mind, kids have a hard time hearing negatives. Instead, they tend to focus on the real content of what we’re saying, rather than the positive or negative we’ve tacked on to it.  So for instance, when we say, “Don’t pee in your pants” kids hear “Pee in your pants” and when we say “Stop hitting your brother” kids hear “Hit your brother.” read more