Have you ever noticed that the way kids are around animals is like a microcosm of the way they are around everyone? When young people are happy, comfortable, and compassionate, they treat animals with kindness and care. And when they’re upset about something or feeling picked on and powerless, they often take out their aggressions on the family pet.
If you have a pet, pay attention this week to how your children treat the animals in your home. Are they gentle and caring, allowing the pet to come to them? Or do they chase, pull, grab, and harass the family cat or dog?
If your child is treating animals with care, you can develop their empathy skills even further by assigning them responsibilities like feeding the animals and giving them water. Older kids can even help brush and bathe the family pet. By taking the time to care for another, young people can begin to realize that they can have a positive impact on others through their care and hard work.
If on the other hand, your child is treating animals in a less than compassionate way, this is a perfect opportunity for them to learn empathy! By showing your child how to touch a pet in a way that is pleasurable for the animal, you can help your child develop a new awareness of other creatures and their likes and dislikes. When you remind your child that the cat doesn’t like to be chased, but will come and sit on her lap if invited, you’re teaching her patience, kindness, and how to be magnetic and inviting. What a great set of skills! Continue reading “Pets help kids learn empathy”
Isn’t it amazing what kids find funny? I’ve been surprised more than once by what seems hilarious to a 2, 4 or 6 year old. And then I remember, their sense of humor is just developing. Kids this age have a challenging time understanding word play and innuendo, but they do know that burps, farts, and poop are some of the funniest things around.
When I was about three years old I developed a fear of the dark. I can remember being terrified in complete darkness and feeling so comforted by a nightlight or a hall light left on with my bedroom door left open. I don’t remember what precipitated the fear, but I do remember it was real and I really appreciated it when my parents responded compassionately.
When I discovered “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman my world was turned upside down…in a good way. Chapman’s theory is that there are five primary love languages and that each of us tends to have one language we give and receive love in the most often and the most easily. He says that often people are trying to express love, but those efforts are not getting received as love by the other person. This struck a chord for me particularly in my relationship with my dad.
Parents are the ultimate experts on the art of surrender. You have to be. If we didn’t surrender to the reality of our lives as parents, we’d be miserable and struggling constantly! Instead, we learn to go with the flow, relax and let go, and accept what is. Before I was pregnant I never realized how soon this process begins. But during the first few months of pregnancy when I was nauseous unless I was constantly eating protein, I realized that I was in practice mode for parenting already. I had to let go of my own desires and eat what my baby needed. And at first I felt I was forced to surrender.